I have reached 30 years of age as of February 3rd. 🎂 (U+1F382) 🎉 (U+1F389)

Let’s talk a bit about that. What’s not to love from the past, the present, and the future?

The Past Decade

After failing to pass required base classes, I got kicked out of college. I picked up C# again some months later, and would start a vast array of small projects to mess around in. The apps were often quick experiments or jokes using WinForms, for myself and friends. At the time, I wasn’t thinking of having a profession regarding coding, since the college diploma was for system administration.

But, feeling a little down after being kicked out, and in need of some sort of degree to continue, I enrolled to obtain a DVS (Diploma of Vocational Studies, “Formation professionelle”) in technical support some time into 2014, and I got the diploma in 2016. Around that time, I had a little internship and IT job in 2015. I thought I was going somewhere with this life of mine, the job was okay, but eventually got fired for lack of employment (in other words, lack of things to do).

Knowing I would dislike technical support, in 2017, I enrolled into an ACS (Attestation of College Studies, “Attestation d’études collégiales”) for system administration, hoping I’d “at least get a degree in something”. Funny enough, that time, it wasn’t the DVS that got me a job, it was the fact that I was going to school (for the grant or tax cut an employer could get).

While that employer didn’t get the grant (or tax cut), I continued working during the day (8-hour work day), while I was going to study later in the evening (4 hours), Monday to Friday. I finally got the diploma in 2018.

The jobs after the little IT company were rather a little rough. Providing technical support for 80 counties in a national (provincial 2019 elections) election to yourself? Witnessing company corruption by overpaying clients? Supporting legacy medical applications written in poor C# and C++ (stuck with MSVC v11.0 and MFC/STL/Afx), adding new features as quick as possible?

All in a day’s work.

Between 2017 to 2023, I have worked three jobs. Not bad. I left my last job due to growing frustrations with the management team and source management. After reported a possible HIPAA/PIPEDA violation, I simply walked out. I did what I could, and now I am tired.

In 2024, I have been out of a job. Sadly, it’s only by the end of October that I started to take it seriously. I know, because that’s when I started to record all sent job applications.

Despite the little achievements here and there, it felt like it was a whole decade of dragging my feet around. With so little interest and drive, no wonder I feel the lack of accomplishment, the lack of completing any sort of forever projects.

The Now

Optimistically, I am alive and physically well. I am happy that I have been playing more console games as of late, having finished Baldur’s Gate: Dark Alliance 1 & 2, Champions of Norrath, and Champions: Return to Arms.

At the same moment, things seem rather bleak: The raise in global unrest, seeing others getting a job with ease with me still searching, seeing others progressing their projects and seeing me continuously getting stuck in projects, seeing others doing socially better and seeing myself being awkward with others, et cetera.

Obviously, everyone do have their own set of problems. We’re all flawed. I am no more important than anyone else. It seems, or feels, like a lot, or sometimes too much, to take in. The more you see what you want often, the more you want it.

That’s why it is important to remember to take breaks, like today.

That’s why I’m going for 🍣 (U+1F363).

The Next Decade

I’m unsure where I’ll go from here. I mean, who ever knows?

At least, the objectives of this year are clear and simple: A job and internal peace.

Otherwise: Maybe change career, go back to school, or get a job at a faraway land. The options are there, but as usual, I am rather indecisive. Anyone would be. That is a major fork in the road of life.

The current plan is to keep looking for a job for some time. If nothing comes up in a few months, it’s back to school for me.

As usual, hoping for the better. I hope you have a good one.